A Musical Journey

I have loved and played music ever since I can remember. One of my first memories is sitting on a piano bench with my feet dangling high off the ground. I also recall sitting in our bedroom as a five year-old, playing on the cassette player, my parents' entire collection of Beethoven symphonies.

I have always played classical music on violin and piano from age three up until about age twenty-two. I start teaching myself guitar on a really cheap classical guitar when I turn sixteen and play U2, David Bowie songs by ear, staying up until 2 AM after finishing my homework on school nights.

In college, I play guitar erratically. I play violin and piano more regularly, usually to entertain people, to play in ensembles when asked by friends.

During medical school and residency, I play no music at all. I become very depressed, sleep deprived, and extremely grumpy. I no longer keep up with current pop music as I veer off into listening to trance, ambient music. The few groups' names I remember are Kruder and Dorfmeister, Tricky, Massive Attack, the Crystal Method, Fatboy Slim, B-tribe. I hear their music on Jason Bentley's Metropolis show on KCRW as I am driving home or studying late at night.

From 1993 until 2013 I am living in a cave, studying medicine, training in my specialty, working and taking care of our family. I shuttle from school/work to home, or between the kids' schools and activities. I write short stories and essays, I read as much as possible, but I play no music.

In January, 2014, my father and father-in-law die within three weeks of each other. Their deaths jolt me awake. I am determined to make the most of my own remaining time. I return to music. Like a phoenix song, the music is a healing balm for my soul. I play music when words fail, when nothing else helps. (originally posted on 6/26/2016 @ 2:20 AM)